Wednesday, September 28, 2005

All in a Day's Work

Today I came to an upsetting realization. Despite the fact that I joke about the place I work and the ridiculous things that go on there all the time, I think I am just as crazy as everyone else. I came to this conclusion when I was thinking about the fact that when I'm alone in the elevator and the doors are about to open, I stick a key in between the two doors as if I were opening them myself.

The second piece of evidence came when I remembered that I often press a piece of Scotch tape onto the back of my left hand. I leave it there for awhile, then remove it and examine my skin pattern on the sticky side and then throw it away. I don't know why I do this and it took awhile before I even realized I was doing it that frequently.

And finally, you know how---sometimes when people are bowing after a performance and they do that flitty hand circle thing while they lower their arm?---well sometimes I do that when I answer my phone at work. And I did do that today when I took the following call from a stranger.

The stranger talked for awhile then asked if I am a lawyer or just a paralegal. When I told him I am neither, he asked, "Why? Didn't you finish school?" I told him I did indeed go to school, but not law school and, in fact, have never had a desire to be a lawyer. "What is your name then?" he asked. I told him my first name (which is of Greek origin) and he said, "Are you Latina?" I told him I am not, to which he replied, "Well, I think you should go to medical school." "OK" was all I could come up with.

After a little more chatting on his part, he gave me his address. Now, I don't really need his address and I couldn't really understand everything he said, so I knew I was in trouble when he asked me to repeat his address back to him. Luckily I had gotten everything down except the city, so I just asked, "What city did you say again?" to which he said something I, again, could not understand. "Rabbledabble?" I asked. "NO! RABBLEDABBLE!" he exclaimed. By which, I later found out, he meant Riverdale. And that was that. I think it may be time for this gentleman to seize the title of Very Good Question Asker.

8 comments:

Star said...

I just put a piece of tape on the back of my left hand.

Anonymous said...

I think I just smiled for the first time today. I like crazy people!

Carly said...

I remember the hand flitty thing. You've been doing that for ages.

kacy faulconer said...

I put tape on my lips and then look at that. It also removes lip gunge. Do you have hand gunge?

Melissa said...

Thanks for all the crazy support, everyone. And it never even occurred to me to put tape on my lips!

Suzie Petunia said...

I put tape on my nose and pull it up tight to stick the other end to my forehead. I get lots of laughs from my kids. Do you get laughs from co-workers? Or are you just crazy and all alone at the same time? Cause that would be sad. I FELT like I was crazy with the tape thing until I finally had kids. Now it seems like an ok thing to do.

Do you think it is possible that instead of my kids MAKING me crazy, they are actually making me UNcrazy??

Anonymous said...

I think Mr. RabbleDabble has called me before!

Carrie Ann said...

You're not crazy. A few years ago, Clinique used the old "crazy tape of the back of the hand" as a marketing promotion to peddle their new lotion. They would put a piece of tape on the back of your hand, pull it off, and say, "look at all that dry skin!" Then they would convince you to buy some stuff. Newsflash! Skin always comes up on the tape, no matter how moisturized you are! So there you have it...