More About Celebrity Men

Matthew McConaughey opened the NASCAR season at the Daytona 500 with "Gentlemen, start your engines" and he did a mighty fine job of it. He also said he was pulling for Jimmie Johnson, which really hauled my ashes over the state line and back. But my favorite Matthew McConaughey moment was a few years ago at the Grammys when he announced the performance of D'Angelo by putting his palms down on the podium and, leaning over into the microphone in a semi-standing push-up position (which I have seen him do on other awards shows), and said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, D (pause) Ange (pause) L(hold the L)o" in a way that can only be heard and not written (obviously as I have proven) in his charming Texas accent. Actually, I frequently mimic his "D'Angelo" whenever he comes onscreen. However, I am saddened by the fact that recently, everytime I have seen him, he looks stoned. He also seems to be growing into a cocky arrogance that is souring me to him a little, but not enough to take him off my celebrity boyfriends list yet (that is a little helpful hint to any of you who may not have taken my quiz in the previous post yet, you know who you are).

Another Quiz

This time it's about me.

Name This Song

The first to email me (see my profile page) with the correct answer wins:

"You're so fine, they'll never see ya leavin' by the back door."

Good Luck.

When I Come Around

Sometimes I am slow about coming around to things. Off the top of my head, here are a few things I didn't like at first:

1. Salsa. I wouldn't eat salsa until about 2 years ago. I still don't like to bite into big chunks, but I really enjoy salsa now, especially my roommate's homemade version.

2. Cameron. I feel I can say this because I really like Cameron now. However, in my blog beginning, I didn't know Cameron's sense of humor, or even who he was or how he had gotten to my blog...just that he was a stranger who had written a few comments along the lines of "Get a Life," probably not meant to be rude, but how was I to know when all I saw when I clicked on his name was a post about blogging on the toilet?

3. Maroon 5. I've had Songs About Jane for about a year. I got it when "This Love" was popular and really only listened to it and "Harder to Breathe" because sometimes I get impatient with CDs when I don't know the songs. I never gave it a chance, but recently Shotzy got the CD and started playing it. A LOT. Now I have it on in my car and am in the process of learning all the words to all the songs.

4. "Daughters" by John Mayer. I hated this song at first. Now, not only do I not change the station when it comes on, but I sing along.

5. Country Music. I have discussed this in a previous post.

6. Hitch. Okay, so I actually haven't seen it yet. But I really want to. When I saw the preview for the first time, I thought, "I never want to see that." Now I'm totally sucked in and think it looks funny. Sometimes it just takes a little repetition to change my mind.

A Valentine Blog

I wanted to write a Valentine blog like Carly’s, but when I tried I realized it wasn’t as funny when you are not married. So here are some of my random Valentine ramblings...

Why are diamond heart pendants the only gift ever advertised on Valentine’s Day?

I hate when people say Singles' Awareness Day. Or when people are bitter about it. Or when girls w/o boyfriends feel like they all have to go out together that night. I would rather stay home and eat my mini-valentine cake while watching my boyfriend Kiefer Sutherland on 24.

I hate the commercial where the lady says she would rather receive a Hershey bar than flowers. What? Does anyone believe that?

I love Valentine’s Day, whether or not anything special happens. I’ve faced the fact that on the Valentine’s Days when I don’t have a boyfriend, nothing big is going to happen. Do people really make declarations or go out on a limb on Valentine's Day if they are not already attached?? Well, I guess some people do, but I’ve never had any sort of declaration or surprise on Valentine’s Day...except in 9th grade when I got some flowers at school from a secret admirer. I ended up doing some serious detective work and tracked down the party responsible for sending them: my mom.

Three years ago, I sent out an anonymous secret admirer Valentine. I will never do this again, because I think it’s just rude to do that if you are NEVER going to reveal yourself, which I, of course, didn’t. Sorry, HB.

It may be cheesey, but I love the candies, the hearts, the cards, the cupids, the reds, the pinks—it’s just fun. What’s better than a holiday about love? Happy Valentine’s Day!

Weekend Update

1. I always end up in huge conversations with other people waiting in the lobby, whenever I get the oil changed in my car. This doesn’t really happen to me in a lot of places, but ALWAYS at the Autostop. Everyone there is just so friendly. On Friday, I was having a lovely chat with a man and a woman about sharks and stiletto heels. The woman was black and I felt compelled to let her know I was reading Beloved by Toni Morrison, I’m not sure why. I pulled it out of my purse and she commented. Ding Ding. Just what I wanted.

2. Friday night I went to a Napoleon Dynamite party. There were people in costumes and we were served school lunch. On trays. Hot dogs, tater tots, green beans, peaches. There was a piñata. And we watched the movie. It was funny. They also passed around plates of tater tots and chips with melted cheese during the movie.

3. A friend thought the guy sitting in front of us was dressed up as Uncle Rico. But we found out he had never even seen the movie.

4. Did you know the lady that rides up to uncle Rico on her bike at the end is Kip’s wife in real life?

5. Did you know that my freshman year at BYU, Napoleon was a freshman too and would run around Helaman Halls with his twin brother and friend dressed in tights, speedos, t-shirts and goggles and squirt any couples with water guns? Then they would hand them a card that said, “You’ve been attacked by Fast Eddie and the Twins” and run off.

6. We got some candy from the piñata, which ended up in a sucker fight at my house after the party. As Emily drove away, Shotzy and I threw suckers at her car. She didn’t really leave but circled the block and parked and came back on foot. It was funny to see her head pop around the bushes at midnight as part of our candy war.

7. Two Saturdays this month I have ended up at the Bailey’s Crossroads DSW because I really need some black heels. I haven’t found any either time, but both times I have had to fight off my strong desire to go into CiCi’s Pizza and have the all-you-can-eat buffet for 3.99. The pizza is not even that good, but the smell starts to lure me in…but then I get too embarrassed to go in alone to the buffet.

8. Only after entering the 6th dressing room at TJMaxx (the number it took for me to find one where the door actually closed) and trying on a suit, did I realize I had already tried that exact suit on two weeks before and it didn’t look good then either.

9. I also tried on a dress that would only look good on someone the size of Kate Hudson or if I were looking for a Daisy Buchanan costume.

10. The friendly produce stocker at the grocery store was whistling the theme from The Andy Griffith Show, which for some reason, I know is called “The Fishin’ Hole.”

11. Commercials on the Sci-Fi channel, for the Sci-Fi Channel, are F-R-E-A-K-Y.

12. At the end of Relief Society yesterday, we were told to go into the gym because there was a surprise from the Elders Quorum. We went in and they had different Valentine’s cakes and were serving us. I thought it was so thoughtful and nice, except for the guy who came up to give me a piece shoved it at me and said, “Cake?” in a tone that showed he was annoyed. Anyway, I am grateful that the EQ in general made an effort to do something nice for us, even if I did get a bad delivery. It reminded me of a few years ago, when the EQ came into our classes and gave us each a rose. I was the last person on the end of the back row and when the man got to me he had 3 roses left: 2 bright, big beautiful ones and one small bud. He gave me the bud and walked away. Ahhh. Singles Wards.

13. What was that J.Lo-Marc Anthony broadway song/Spanish soap opera number on the Grammys?

14. Shotzy asked me what my level of attraction to Adam Levine of Maroon 5 was. I replied with an 8, but immediately apologized for it. I felt like I had to, because she has had boyfriend claim on him for awhile.

15. Today I am dressed like a Valentine Lollipop.

The New Lucy

Recently I've read several articles mentioning a comparison of Jennifer Aniston's comedic timing to that of Lucille Ball. I disagree. First of all, I will say that I do love Lucy. Perhaps it isn't the funniest show on earth and sometimes she gets on my nerves, but I grew up watching Lucy reruns and think there is something to be said for her and her comedy. She was a breakthrough in the world of "girls being funny," and that is something I can get behind.

I would like to put forth my opinion that Debra Messing is the New Lucille Ball, and not just because of the redhead thing. Watch her. She is funny. She IS like Lucy.

I do not, however, want this post to be considered as a promotion for The Wedding Date. As a matter of fact, I would recommend not seeing it. I didn't expect a lot out of it, just for it to be a cute little love story as most chick flicks are. It is basically a reverse Pretty Woman that has no continuity. I found myself continually asking, "What?" because things were so choppy and the story was unappealing and ridiculous. The only things it had going for it were 1) London, 2) Debra's character's suitcases 3) beautiful clothes & scenery and 4) Dermot Mulroney, who can't even act but is just so pretty.

Anyway, like I said, don't waste your time. But I still love Debra.

Geography Quiz

Here's a fun little test.

A Few Ridiculous Things that I (and the Virginia House of Delegates) Have Been Up To:

1. Saturday I bought Paula Abdul’s Get Up and Dance WorkoutVideo. Yes, the one from 1994. Schatze asked me if it was in the One Spot at Target for $1. Oh no, I paid full price for it. I told Carly yesterday that I bought it and she told me she had it. I felt better for a minute until I realized that she probably bought it when it came out 11 years ago and she was 15 years old. Anyway, I did it last night and I thought it was fun. I was however disappointed that only the warm-up and cool-down portions were done to Paula Abdul songs and the main “routine” segment wasn’t. AND not even once did I hear part of “Cold Hearted Snake.”
2. Last night I watched 7th Heaven. I kept hearing ads for it on the radio yesterday saying “Lucy goes on her first date.” It’s embarrassing to say that I know which girl is Lucy and that she is married and recently had a baby on the show, so I was perplexed. It turns out it was RUTHIE having her first date. What was odd was that the boy she was going out with may have had more makeup on than she did. I also am disturbed by the fact that the twin boys in the family, who are probably about 7 years old, still talk like 3 year olds. I think they are still going for the “cute little kid” element, but hopefully they will soon be replaced by Lucy’s new baby. You can’t keep dragging it out once they get too big. I think we all learned this lesson with the introduction of Olivia when Rudy Huxtable got too old.
3. I wish I could go home and change clothes. I would be dressed appropriately right now, if I were 17 or going ice skating. My pale pink quilted jacket paired with pink sparkly eye shadow just aren’t going to cut it. But I have learned my lesson and will reserve this outfit for winter fun or going to the mall with my little sisters in the future.
4. Today the Virginia House of Delegates will vote on what has become known as the “Thong Bill.” Apparently it could soon be illegal in Virginia to sag your pants.

Please never call me a man’s name.

I have 2 names. Even though Marcy is just a nickname, it has been around long enough, and I’m called Marcy by enough people, that I consider it, well not the same as my real name, but close. The problem lies in shortening it, which often happens. Well, I guess just shortening it in writing is the problem. For example, shorten Marcy to one syllable in your mind, sans the –ee sound at the end. Now think about how you would spell it. When you see Marc, you want to say Mark. And when you see Mars, you say Marz. I could spell it Marss, I guess, but that looks weird and still doesn’t necessarily get the point across. Plus, I generally don’t write it-- it’s usually other peeps writing to me, for example in an email that says, “Hey Marc, how’s your day?”
Oh well. What’s a girl to do?

So my real name is Melissa and I feel like most of you know that. And if not, you obviously haven’t clicked on my e-mail address on my profile page. There are several nicknames for Melissa and I have been called all of them.

Missy: My family calls me this and I like it fine. I think it is sweet. I am not the kind of girl who would ever go by Missy though.

Melis: I like this one also. I guess I just like nicknames in general, unless they are masculine.

Ed and Amy in my office are always calling me Melis. My boss has never used it, but obviously he has heard everyone else using it. Amy told me that once she was in with our boss when he was on the phone. He told the woman on the phone that she needed to contact me, and said to her, “Oh, you need to talk with Melissa in our office about that. Just give her a call. Actually, she goes by Melis. That’s M-E-L-I-S…”

Mel: I hate this one. I think it has to do with the masculine nature of the word, similar to Marc. The only person who has ever called me Mel when I didn’t cringe was Rudy. And that was years ago, and he was handsome and from the Dominican Republic. So unless you fit those criteria, please refrain.

That reminds me of a wooden carving my grandparents used to have hanging in their kitchen. I remember when I was really young, maybe 5 or 6, always reading it and trying to figure out what it meant. It said, “If you don’t like someone, the way he holds his spoon will drive you crazy. If you do like him, he can dump his plate in your lap and you won’t mind.” I remember asking my dad what it meant, and he explained it to me. But I didn’t truly understand until years later.

During that time I was home schooled, just for a about a year and a half, then I went to public school, then a Catholic school, then back to a public school. Anyway, the other day I stumbled on a blog by a homeschooler, “My life as a Teenage Partial Insomniac” by a 14-year-old in Missouri. In my tradition of bookmarking teenage blogs, I did so. What I found so strange is, only after reading this blog for over a month, did I realize I had been mistaken the entire time in thinking it was a boy writing it. It disturbed me that I had made this huge mistake and I wanted to go back and re-read all her blogs and see if I had missed any major clues about her gender.

Speaking of teenage blogs, I was sad to see today that The Alex Morrisse has decided not to blog anymore.

Will you meet me in the middle?

My goal today is to learn all the words to “Sister Golden Hair.” After a failed attempt at getting to Mario’s for pizza last night, I ended up at the Silver Diner. They have those little jukeboxes on the table and I knew what I was going to select the minute I started flipping through the song charts.

Whenever I hear “Sister Golden Hair,” I immediately reach for the volume and turn it up. For me it’s one of those songs that I really like, but don’t own or hear enough to get sick of it. And I’m sure that part of my love for the song has to do with the fact that America is singing about golden hair, the same way I love a certain song with my name in it by the Allman Brothers, even though I consider it a little boring.

Anyway, question about the song: what is the surprise part all about? The name of the song is “Sister Golden Hair,” not “Sister Golden Hair Surprise,” so is the surprise still referring to her? Or is surprise an interjection? “Well, I keep on thinking ‘bout you, Sister Golden Hair. Surprise! And I just can’t live without you, can’t you see it in my eyes?” Did they just add surprise to rhyme with eyes? I don’t get it.

So, my two goals of the day are: 1. Memorize all the words and 2. Figure out if he is calling her “Sister Golden Hair Surprise,” or if he is saying “Surprise! I think about you all the time and I can’t live without you.”

I was also told this morning that it is not cool to like America, but I don’t care. I am going to continue to love this song and turn it up really, really loud in my car. Schatze had been holding out on me that she had this CD and so when we got home from the diner, she dug it out of her closet and we listened to it again. I borrowed it and couldn’t wait to get up and listen to it this morning. I am a nerd like that, but I had to get an early start to memorizing all the lyrics today. I even had a hard time turning on my hair dryer while it was playing.

Also, on our way home from the diner, as I turned on to our street, “Stacie’s Mom” by Fountains of Wayne came on the radio. I don’t love this song or anything but we always have to listen to it because our roommate is named Stacie and, to her dismay, we call her Wayne. So of course, when this song came out we couldn’t believe the coincidence. As I parked my car on the street, I turned it off so it was just on the battery so we could listen to the rest of the song because Schatze was singing the main parts that drag out the last word like “give me the sli-i-i-i-ip.” Then I would sing the back up echo at the end of the line. While we were sitting there a black cat came walking down the sidewalk towards us and we were just singing and watching it when suddenly Schatze, trying to scare the cat, jumped toward the window and started banging on it, actually scaring me way more than the cat.

Give a Little Bit of your [blog] Love to her...

Please welcome my friend Katie Blue into our circle of blog friends. She is a newcomer to blogging and is a funny, funny girl.

My Mom Phil

My mom is a high school history teacher. Depending on the semester, she generally teaches AP or regular American History, World History or Contemporary Issues. This semester she has a student teacher. I love it when my mom calls to tell me what the student teacher has been up to. I don't know where she went to college or why she thinks she is qualified to teach American History.

First, she asked my mom, "What was the Cold War again?"
Then a few days later, after my mom had to tell her it was the Civil War that Reconstruction followed, she told my mom her plan to explain Reconstruction. "I'll just tell them if they want to know what the South looked like after the Civil War, to just look at the wall over there." After my mom asked her what in the world she was talking about, she replied that, well, that wall is pretty blank.

My mom is obviously a little worried about the fact that her student teacher wants to make the students look at a blank wall and other things that don't make sense. And while my mom appreciates the time she puts into detail and to coming up with creative ideas, we both agree that her time would be better spent actually learning the information she is going to teach instead of on her upcoming class lecture project: "Reconstruction: Extreme Home Makeover of the South."

I wish I had been in my mom's history class. She is one smart cookie and is funny to boot. Her students call her Phil instead of Ms. Phillips. And she called one of her former students by her street name "Snake."

When I was at home for Christmas, I saw one of her student's school pictures on the fridge and I asked who it was. She said it was one of her aides who sometimes babysits my little brother. A few weeks later, she called me one day at work during her planning period. I heard someone in the background come in and say to my mom, "You're talking too loud." I asked her who had said that and she replied, "Just a student. Oh, you know that girl whose picture you were asking about." Then I heard her turn to the girl who had been standing there the whole time listening and tell her that I had said, "Oh, the ugly one?" I started cracking up and she told the girl she was just kidding.

Also, who else has a picture of John Wayne in their American History classroom? I never did.

A couple of years ago, she sent copies of her American History Final as well as her Constitution test for my roommates, hometeachers and me. It turned into a little competition and was a lot of fun.

Despite the fact that I really liked my high school American History teacher Mrs. Little (she still emails me sometimes), I think it would have been a blast to have witnessed the antics that I'm sure go down in my mom's classroom.

A Boring Blog - Sorry.

I already subscribe to more magazines than I can read. It must be the new thing in the Tennessee schools to sell magazine subscriptions for fundraisers because suddenly I am getting requests from family members monthly.

First of all, I have already been getting Elle and Real Simple to help support Mothers Against Drunk Driving. Then I got my first fundraising magazine drive letter from my cousin Reed back in November. I thought about selecting a magazine for someone as a Christmas gift, but then I couldn't find just the right thing and I didn't want to settle for giving someone a Christmas gift he/she might not want, just to support my cousin. So I ordered the cheapest magazine that I found interesting: Conde Nast Traveler. The following month I received a fundraiser magazine drive letter from my little sister. Luckily my roommate wanted to order The Economist and so I signed her up for a discounted version via my sis. Plus, I felt great about it because it was the most expensive magazine listed and so a bigger donation was made than if I had ordered anything. Then yesterday, I got ANOTHER fundraising magazine drive letter from cousin Jeffrey.

My options are:
1. throw away the letter.
2. order another magazine that I won't have time to read.
3. give a gift subscription to someone. One of my sisters is having her 25th birthday next week. That is an option, but my guess is she's getting the same magazine fundraising letters I am.

Any other ideas?

Have any of you been watching SuperNanny? Well, I never had until last night. All night I felt so tired and couldn't wait to go to bed. But then after 24 was over, Shotzy was going to crack my back and when she was done I was so sucked in to SuperNanny that I stayed up later than I had intended to finish the episode. I did learn a lot though.