I Can't Think of a Good Title But I Have to Go Now Because It's Burger Night Which I'm Really Excited About. Read This Post and You'll Understand.

I wonder if there is anyone out there who will read this or if everyone who ever read my blog has just stopped checking it. I wouldn't blame them. Well, here I am-- partly because of Skewedview's challenge and partly because I feel a little bit of guilt at not having written in so long. After all, this blog did get me a job and a husband.

So I guess I'll just dive in and tell you some of what I have been up to in the last, oh, 3 months or so. As I said, I got a job and I'm working with Alice. Too bad peeps get fired for blogging about their jobs because there is a lot I could tell you. So I'll just divulge this small piece of info: When I started working, I found a card with a phone number under F in the rolodex on my desk for a contact merely listed as "Fat Lady."

I've also been spending a lot of time thinking about, talking about, and eating food. But mostly just eating. And as evidence, I give you the bag under my bed containing 10 pair of pants that I can almost fit in. My mom did tell me if I wanted to be thin, I shouldn't have married Neil who is fixing me 3 delicious meals a day. Although the problem is really not in the number of meals I'm eating, but the quantity I consume for each meal. Mine is not a humble portion. Perhaps last weekend's large burrito, double cheeseburger, fries, cokes, Krispy Kremes, deep dish pizza and ribs were a little much. After all that, I couldn't even make it through Fast Sunday. Around 2:30 in the afternoon, I climbed out of bed and headed for the kitchen and scarfed down some leftover chicken salad 2 hours prior to dinner. I guess you could say I lost it.

I've also been doing a lot of reading. My most recent books have been Peace Like A River, Mrs. Dalloway, Atonement, The Wonder Spot, Freakonomics, Home Alone America, The Power of One and The Alchemist. Have you read any of these? Let's talk.

Besides the "my life is comprised by an obsession with food" guilt, I've also been feeling a little guilty about all the piano playing Neil has been asked to do lately. It all started when he was asked if I play by a man who was looking for a pianist at an upcoming baptism. Since we were going to be away, Neil distracted them by saying, "Actually I play, but we're going to be away that weekend." Lucky for me, I have a husband who protects me. Unfortunately for him, that dude remembered and then after asking Neil to play in the joint Priesthood/Relief Society meeting 2 weeks ago, people were literally lined up with pianist requests immediately following that meeting. My light is still under a bushel, and luckily with Neil on my side, it looks like it's going to stay that way.

I've also been doing a lot of learning about marriage and what it takes to be a good wife. The first thing I've learned is: It's a good idea to try and dress like your husband. What you do is just wait until he gets dressed then put on a matching outfit. It's fun and not annoying at all! The second thing I've learned is: When your husband is in the shower... hide! When he gets out, he will eventually start wondering where you went and start looking for you. And it's even better if, when he finds you, you are wearing his clothes. This is not annoying either and never gets old. And if anyone were ever to think this was annoying, then you just threaten to stab him with a letter opener.

I also got a haircut last week. I decided not to return to Jesus/Maggie who, after showing her this photo:





made my hair look like:
































So this time I got smart and went to Fifi, who, when I showed her this pic (yes, I will only have hair like Mandy Moore now):


























made me look like this:




























Just kidding. I really like my haircut now and I only look like Rod when I wake up in the morning.

Anyway, that's it for now. I hope you're all still out there. I plan on sticking around because living in San Francisco and being married to a national-award-winning husband is really supplying me with a lot of material.

Blogging. It's on my calendar. Remind me to tell you how, thanks to my adequately meaty wrists and Neil's freakishly strong lats, we are hoping that someday we'll *have a professional bowler.

*This is just a thought/prediction/hope and in no way any sort of announcement or anything closely related to one.